The action continues mid week with some awesome matches to further shape the look of the league table again. Of particular interest are the clashes between Villa and United, which always go down to one goal separating the two teams, Chelsea’s visit to Goodison Park, which ended like this last round and of course the match of the week, Liverpool’s trip to a struggling Arsenal [remember this].
If results are similar to last round, Chelsea will extend their lead at the top to 3 points, while United’s gain on Arsenal would be cut back to just 4… however, given current form, Rooney and Drogba scoring at will and Arsenal’s lack there of, I don’t see any of this shit going down, so this is how I’ve picked’em for mid week.
I predict:
Man City 2 v 1 Bolton
Portsmouth 1 v 0 Sunderland
Wigan 1 v 1 Stoke City
Fulham 2 v 0 Burnley
Arsenal 1 v 1 Liverpool
Aston Villa 1 v 2 Man Utd
West Ham 2 v 2 Birmingham
Wolves 1 v 2 Tottenham
Blackburn 3 v 2 Hull City
Everton 0 v 2 Chelsea
As expected both Real and Barca took their respective teams to the cleaners this weekend… I have the receipt if you don’t believe me, even though Barca finished the match with 9 men against a resilient Getafe. It was an amicable performance by the visitors, cause playing against 9 men of Barca is similar to playing any other full strength team in La Liga… outside of the top two. As for the rest of the round is was pretty average and so were the predictions by our friends Heads or Tails.
Gameweek score:
5 out of 10
Results:
Valencia 2 v 0 Valladolid
FC Barcelona 2 v 1 Getafe
Real Madrid 3 v 0 Espanyol
Athletic Bilbao 3 v 2 Xerez
Mallorca 1 v 0 Villarreal
Zaragoza 2 v 1 Sevilla
Racing Santander 1 v 1 Atletico Madrid
Malaga 0 v 0 Deportivo La Coruña
Osasuna 1 v 0 Tenerife
Almeria 3 v 1 Sporting Gijon
The Spanish giant’s in action:
Match highlights – Barcelona 2 v 1 Getafe:
Results – La Liga – Week 17
Predictions – La Liga – Week 16
Barca Conquer The World – Estudiantes 1 v 2 Barcelona
Lionel Is Legend, Barca Through To Final – Atlante 1 v 3 Barcelona
A terrible, terrible weekend of match predictions by yours truly and an even worse week for the Prem, as thanks to Everton, Tottenham, Villa and City’s poor, poor form, those jammy bastards Liverpool undeservedly re-entered the top four and have actually gained some momentum… look out Arsenal! United briefly went top of the pops till this happened, meanwhile at the ass end of the table, only 8 points separate 11th placed Stoke City and second last Wolves… Pompey should just start drawing up plans for next season’s fizzy-pop championship.
Gameweek score:
3 out of 10
Results:
Liverpool 1 v 0 Everton
Bolton 0 v 0 Fulham
Burnley 2 v 1 West Ham
Hull City 2 v 1 Man City
Man Utd 5 v 0 Portsmouth
Stoke City 3 v 0 Blackburn
Sunderland 1 v 1 Wigan
Tottenham 0 v 0 Aston Villa
Birmingham 2 v 1 Wolves
Chelsea 2 v 0 Arsenal
A glimpse of the weekend’s action:
Match highlights – Liverpool 1 v 0 Everton:
With 12 goals in 10 starts against the Gunners it’s clear that the morning of a match against Arsenal, Didier Drogba wakes up on mounds of money with loads of beautiful women, shapes his eyebrows in the mirror with his index and pinky fingers, winks at himself a couple hundred times while shooting his hands like pistols then proceeds to say to “I am the king!”… shit I know I’d be doing that if I were scoring goals like he did last night and don’t kid yourself, you would too!
The Ivorian king in unstoppable form:
Match highlights:
Title Six Pointer! Chelsea v Arsenal
Hold The Phone! Chelsea 3 v 3 Everton
Lace Up, Save Lives – Designed to fight AIDS in Africa
Drogba Dispatches Gunners – Arsenal 0 v 3 Chelsea
My heart says Arsenal will pull some magic out of their demoralised hats [like here], cause I want to see a three way tussle at the top of the league… and there’s nothing wrong with a three way, no matter which way you look at it. My head however says go against the might of the Blues at ‘The Bridge’ at your own peril… so peeps this is how it’s going to go down! Arsenal to take an early lead and Chelsea to muscle their way back in and bring home the goods.
Quick stats
Chelsea:
- Exposed some weaknesses away to Hull mid week.
- Chelsea have the best head-to-head record of the Big Four clubs this season, winning all three league matches without conceding a goal. Arsenal have the worst head-to-head record, losing three of their four matches and conceding nine goals.
- The Blues have kept 11 clean sheets this season, more than any other side in the division.
- Didier Drogba has scored 10 goals in his last nine matches against Arsenal in all competitions.
Arsenal:
- Bruised and battered after last weeks home defeat to Man Utd
- They are the Premier League’s leading scorers with 60 goals in 24 matches.
- Arsene Wenger needs one win to register 300 as a Premier League manager.
Source: BBC
I predict:
Chelsea 2 v 1 Arsenal
Drogba Dispatches Gunners – Arsenal 0 v 3 Chelsea
Arsenal Gunned Down… Again! Arsenal 1 v 4 Chelsea
Review – Chelsea 1 v 2 Arsenal
My lack of posting this week can only be attributed to the fact that I’ve been preoccupied trying to chase down Toni Terry, you know to get her on the rebound, all the ladies say I’m so smooth! What, you didn’t ACTUALLY think she was in Dubai for the Shopping Festival did you!? Anyway, it’s only a matter of time before she forgives John and moseys on back to London to live her “perfect life” again and I’m back to flicking through Victoria’s Secrets catalogs in a bid just to get a glimpse of some feminine body parts… so before I shoot out the door again tonight (handcuffs, hessian sack and Rohypnol in bag) here are my predictions for this weekend’s matches.
Ps. I’m expecting a late Tim Cahill equaliser in the Merseyside derby… just cause he loves heaping pressure on under performing teams and he likes scoring against Liverpool too.
I predict:
Liverpool 1 v 1 Everton
Bolton 1 v 0 Fulham
Burnley 2 v 2 West Ham
Hull City 1 v 3 Man City
Man Utd 3 v 0 Portsmouth
Stoke City 0 v 0 Blackburn
Sunderland 1 v 0 Wigan
Tottenham 3 v 2 Aston Villa
Birmingham 1 v 0 Wolves
Chelsea – v – Arsenal*
*Will be published separately tomorrow.
Our amigos over at Heads or Tails are telling me that both Barca and Real will have a stroll in the park this weekend… so I’m off to have one too. And this is how they’ve picked the rest of ‘em this weekend:
Predictions:
Valencia 3 v 1 Valladolid
FC Barcelona 3 v 1 Getafe
Real Madrid 4 v 1 Espanyol
Athletic Bilbao 2 v 0 Xerez
Mallorca 1 v 2 Villarreal
Zaragoza 1 v 1 Sevilla
Racing Santander 2 v 1 Atletico Madrid
Malaga 1 v 0 Deportivo La Coruña
Osasuna 3 v 1 Tenerife
Almeria 1 v 1 Sporting Gijon
You have to excuse me for the very, very delayed posts for today/yesterday; lately I’ve been fighting off “super-injunctions” and quoting the Human Rights Act cause my mates missus couldn’t keep her mouth shut. Never the less, I’m here now and going to touch on what was meant to be January’s show piece match, the big one, Arsenal v Man Utd.
Fact is though it turned out more like the Wayne Rooney show and like a pit bull on a poodle, Wazza (with the help of inspired Ronaldo wannabe Nani) absolutely tore Arsenal to pieces. Every attack measured, every opportunity clinical and every goal embarrassing for the Gunners. And boy didn’t Wenger know it! Source Goal.com:
We were poor defensively and offensively, and when that happens you cannot win a big game,” he told Sky Sports. “We never looked, really, to have that cohesion in the team and at the end of the day we were punished, [and] gave them too much room.
“On top of that I think we made massive individual errors and of course that’s a massive disappointment for us.
“We have to stick together, recover, and prepare well for the next game.”
Besides the fact that Wayne Rooney managed to score his 100th career Premier League goal or even the fact that this was the first football match in histroy to be screened in 3D, the Red Devils also managed to close the gap at the top of the table to 1 point and really turn up the heat on the race to the title.
The only good thing to have come of this match for Arsenal on the other hand, is that the last time they lost so severely at home [remember this], they managed a 10 match unbeaten streak and even found themselves atop of the table for a while… this loss may just be the wake up call they needed to knock them out of their stupor. Have you say with a comment below.
Match highlights:
Rooooney Destroys Hull – Manchester United 4 v 0 Hull City
Tevez Downs Red Devils – Manchester City 2 v 1 Manchester United
Fulham Destroy United – Fulham 3 v 0 Manchester United
United Trounce Wolves – Man Utd 3 v 0 Wolves
My heart says Ghana will take this out (you see a win will lull them into a false sense of security for the World Cup, making Australia the underdogs, just what they want and will in turn give them a chance at, wait for it… world domination! I’m the eternal optimist), but my head screams “How can you look past Egypt’s form and history in this tournament!”… so I predict the Pharaohs to edge out the Black Stars, but only just.
I predict:
Ghana 0 v 1 Egypt
Pharoahs Shoot Down Lions – Egypt 3 v 1 Cameroon
The Eagles Stage Amazing Comeback! Angola 4 v 4 Mali
Godzilla v King Kong, Ali v Foreman, Woods v Nordegren… Gunners v Red Devils!
Like all good rivalries, this top of the table clash promises the making of a grand occasion and there’s no doubt it’ll live up to expectations. More like a clash of two titans, both teams are in great form at the moment and are being inspired by their young prolific stars (Cesc and Roo) who are doing the bulk of the scoring for their respective teams.
It’s been some time since a match between these two teams played any significance in the league, however all that will be trumped tonight and the only question I ask is whose defence will hold out the longest?
Let me know who will win with a comment below.
Quick stats
Arsenal:
- The Gunners are the division’s form team, 24 points from 10 unbeaten league games since a 3-0 home defeat to Chelsea in November.
- They are the Premier League’s leading scorers with 59 goals in 23 matches.
- Cesc Fabregas has scored five goals in his last five league matches.
Manchester United:
- United have taken 13 points from their last five games, with Wayne Rooney scoring seven goals in those matches.
- They have not won any of their last six away league matches at Big Four opposition, losing five times.
- Wayne Rooney and Paul Scholes have each scored 99 Premier League goals. Only 17 players have scored 100 goals or more in Premier League history.
Source: BBC
I predict:
Arsenal 2 v 1 Manchester United
United Crowned Champions Again – Man United 0 v 0 Arsenal
Red Hot Devils Gun Down The Arsenal – Arsenal 1 v 3 Manchester United
Without a doubt, game of the round will see the Red Devils travel to the Emirates to take on the Gunners. Not only are Arsenal and United massive clubs with a rich history and rivalry, but it’s also been some time since a match between them had any major significance in the league and therefore warrants a post of it’s own. So while I gather my thoughts about it and rub one out (of my crystal balls), that prediction will be revealed tomorrow.
In the mean time, there are a number of other important battles going on across the league. With two wins this round Chelsea will once again sit pretty atop of the league, while further a step Villa and Fulham will be fighting to keep their European aspirations alive. Liverpool will do just about anything to be considered a top four club again, while over in London I fear that Tottenham’s lack of consistency may just give the Red’s a sniff back in… jammy pricks! So anyway, without further ado, here’s how I’ve picked ‘em this week.
I predict:
Birmingham 1 v 1 Tottenham
Fulham 2 v 2 Aston Villa
Hull City 1 v 1 Wolves
Liverpool 2 v 0 Bolton
West Ham 1 v 0 Blackburn
Wigan 1 v 2 Everton
Burnley 1 v 5 Chelsea
Man City 3 v 1 Portsmouth
Arsenal – v – Man Utd*
Sunderland v Stoke City
Hull City 0 v 3 Chelsea
Fulham 2 v 1 Portsmouth
*Will be published separately tomorrow.
Red cards and broken noses aside, tonight Los Blancos travel to Estadio Riazor for what our friends at Heads or Tails describe as “a night in Hell!”. Without CRon on deck, it may seem a big ask for Real as their last win at this stadium was in fact a mere 18 years ago… 18 years!!!! That’s some time between drinks. Never the less, we’re being told that Deportivo are in short supply of anything but defenders at the moment, so other than parking the proverbial bus and playing out a draw, they won’t have much to throw at Madrid and tonight this hoodoo may be broken. Well that’s what they’re predicting anyway.
Predictions:
Espanyol 1 v 1 Athletic Bilbao
Sporting Gijón 1 v 3 FC Barcelona
Deportivo La Coruña 1 v 4 Real Madrid
Sevilla 2 v 0 Valencia
Getafe 3 v 2 Racing Santander
Xerez 1 v 1 Mallorca
Tenerife 2 v 2 Zaragoza
Villarreal 3 v 1 Osasuna
Valladolid 3 v 2 Almeria
Atletico Madrid 3 v 1 Malaga
Another mid week round and another set of matches that look set to whet the palate. A win for Liverpool away to the Wolves and a Tottenham loss by city rivals Fulham will see the Reds jump into fourth, which given their form of late is just ridiculous! Expect resistance by Birmingham at Stamford Bridge and even a few close calls for Chelsea too. The show piece this round however will be played at Villa Park, with both Arsenal and Aston Villa in inspired form and itching for more from their respective seasons. All in all, you don’t want to miss the action and this is how I predicted the rest of ‘em.
I predict:
Portsmouth 1 v 1 West Ham
Wolves 0 v 2 Liverpool
Bolton 1 v 0 Burnley
Tottenham 2 v 0 Fulham
Aston Villa 2 v 3 Arsenal
Chelsea 2 v 1 Birmingham
Blackburn 2 v 2 Wigan
Everton 3 v 1 Sunderland
I’ve been avoiding the African’s Cup of Nations this year like a bushman would a fallen Coke bottle and I promise it’s got nothing to do with all the weird hairdo’s kicking about the tournament or the fact that every player in a tight Puma top scares the bejesus out of me. Quite simply I just haven’t been able to get my mojo on watching the ACN… reckon there’s a pill I could take for it, or anything to get me stacked like some of the players for that matter?
And as if Ivory Coast’s untimely defeat wasn’t enough, last night another African powerhouse, Cameroon fell prematurely too… damn, I don’t even think a pill will help me now!
Match highlights – Egypt 3 v 1 Cameroon:
And from a couple days ago match highlights – Ivory Coast 2 v 3 Algeria:
Pharaohs Outfoxed! Egypt 0 v 1 Algeria
Predictions – Final World Cup Spots
Confed Cup – They Finished Second!? Egypt 0 v 3 USA
I don’t know how else to put this, so I’m just going to come out and say it… Manchester United, without Rooney may as well be Take That without Robbie, New Kidz On The Block without Marky Mark Donny or N*Sync without Justin. I’m not saying they’re useless, just that the one common denominator, besides the superstar, is that suspicious Bulgarian looking dude in that’s always in background just to make up the numbers and even out the choreography… hey, how bout grabbing the mike and taking center stage once in a while you leech!?
UPDATE: Apparently, my general knowledge is akin to that of a 5yr old and Marky Mark was never a NKOTB… meh, Donnie, Mark, same same.
Rooney kicking ass and taking names:
Match highlights:
United Score Fantastic Four – Westham 0 v 4 Manchester United
Predictions – Premier League – Week 10
Spurs Silenced By 10-man United – Tottenham 1 v 3 Manchester United
Payback, 5 Times As Nice! England 5 v 1 Croatia